Risky Business

Funchal, Madeira

So, just when does the fun actually begin?

Life in Madeira is more exciting than you might think.  We’ve compiled a list of our favourite “Risky Things”, just in case you ever find yourself in need of a more stimulating life:

#1.  Take A Local Bus

Now, I’m not talking a Funchal city ride.  The one out to Baia da Abra, the extreme east of Madeira, is sufficient.  Boa Viagem and all that!  Snaking, narrow roads, vertigo-inducing cliffs and passing an airport runway built on stilts.  And bus drivers whose ambition is firmly set on Formula One.  We survived the 1 ½ hour trip (several times), but not without some trauma given the smell of burning breaks.  Locals don’t even flinch.  At the Airport, a car hire firm advertises: "MadeiraRent, Drive like a local".  On board the bus, tourists can’t help but snigger.  Every time.  Locals must wonder but WE have badges of merit now – local bus tickets.

Super Glue your car to the roads in Madeira

#2.  Walk in the Sky

OK, so this is not going to be one of those Extreme Sports, but taking a walk over the glass floor of Europe’s highest Cape (and the World’s second highest I might add), certainly sends a chill up or two down your spine.  There is nothing but a sheer 575m drop down and if the clouds lift, the views are spectacular.  As are most of the views as you travel around Madeira.  We took a wild train ride up.  The roads were even narrower and steeper than #1 above.  Yes, our train driver must be related to Jack Brabham too.

Trying very hard not to look down_Cabo Girao

#3. Couch Surfing

Monte is uphill from Funchal.  We took the bus, but it is possible to take a Cable Car.  It’s a pleasant hill resort area and departure point for the wicker toboggans, famous since 1850, for getting locals downhill fast.  Two Carreiros, suitably dressed in traditional costume and straw boaters, use their shoes as brakes in a stunning 2km slide downhill on a very steep and well-polished track.  It looks so very touristy but it was the most fun we’d had in ages (and no comparison to sliding down breaking waves on the trip over). 

Ride a Wicker Basket.  Looks sedate enough....

Tell me there really are brakes on these things...  Oh dear, nooooo!!

#4. Build a Sand Castle

I’ve mentioned deep water.  We can’t seem to see any life in the clearly visible depths below, other than a few scrawny crabs.  The shores are black (volcanic) and the grains are hefty, water washed stones.  The Cap’n didn’t quite see eye-to-eye with the GS’s vision of an ocean-front, 3 bed, 2 bath castle with a moat.  Even if Churchill was rather fond of the place.

Pretty seaside village, Camara de Lobos, named after the rare Monk Seals
 (called sea wolves) found on nearby Desertas Islands

#5. Natural Defences

In Albania we discovered cactus had once been used as natural barbed wire.  Aside from everything else, anything prickly seems to grow with much enthusiasm here in Madeira too.  From Monte, we took a Cable Car to the Botanical Gardens.  It’s a great trip high over forest burned out by bushfires (2012) and we debated whether it was eucalypt, an oily, ticking bomb.  The Gardens were extremely lucky to have not been engulfed by the fires too.  The Cactus Garden especially, is a visual, prickly feast and the Galley Slave, along with many other photographers, snapped like crazy.  The orchid gardens are also inspiring and the Cap’n quickly moved her along, promising a stop in the Lovers Cave (oh, sure!), before she had too many gardening ideas for Dangar.

A prickly customer indeed..